Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Turtles

Every year the turtles swim far through their ocean

Reaching their destination with pride

The females leave their young behind to be born on their own

Hoping a day may come when they reunite in the vast sea like twins separated at birth

The eggs begin to crack and spread apart after two months of resting under the sand

The baby turtles climb out of their eggs and burrow up through the sand

They start their descent down the beach and to the water

Many of the baby turtles will never reach the splashing water

Some by holes in the sand

Some by treacherous humans

Some by skydiving seagulls

Some by the sand pilled above their shells

For the lucky and strong turtles that do make it to the ocean

They swim with no mother to watch them about the vast sea

Only instinct and tell the turtles which direction they should go and when they need to go

2 comments:

  1. This was a good poem! I liked how you used a scene from the real world and made it into a poem, it made it easier to find the meaning of the poem. Also I like your use of repetition in the line "Hoping a day may come when they reunite in the vast sea like twins separated at birth" because it's diferent than having rhymes in defferent sentences, instead you stuck day, may, and they all in the same sentence. In addition you had a lot of alliteration such as "Some by skydiving seagulls". Therefore, addding a different style to your writing and including figurative language made your poem well written and interesting.

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  2. I liked the idea that you had for the poem but I thought that the way you wrote it was kind of like a book. It was basically like reading fact after fact. I think that if you put it into a more poetic form and maybe make the lines of each stanza a bit shorter and more broken up then this would be a really good poem!

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