It's more than just being written on paper.
It's based on what you went through in your last game.
It's your way of realizing your coach don't think you turned into water vapor.
It's always gonna change, never gonna stay the same.
It's the feeling you get when you're on a hot streak,
It's the safety of knowing your not gettin' knocked out,
It's when you feel like you're on a mountain peak,
It's when you know there's no sprout,
coming to steal the spot from you.
Leading off.
You know there's gonna be some jokes,
You better handle hard your bat of oak,
cuz you never know when the next of your folks,
will take it from you,
and turn you into a pile of goo.
Don't sit still for him to steal your stroke.
I think this was a great poem because it uses repitition.For example,You know there's gonna be some jokes,You better handle hard your bat of oak"Therefore this shows you used repition because you made two words ryme.
ReplyDeleteThis was an effective piece to me because I can feel the connection bewteen you and what the poem is about, which is baseball. I can tell you really enjoy baseball and you make it seem so interesting because of the repetition in the poem such as, "It's the", "It's when". In addition your rhyming was very effective too, it kept the ryhthm upbeat, easy, and more exciting to read.
ReplyDeleteThis was a really good poem and I liked it. I especially liked the
ReplyDeleterepetition! I would say to work on your rhyming though. Not all poems
need to rhyme and at times it seemed like you were trying a little to
hard. Like when you said "Will take it from you, And turn you into a
pile of goo" Maybe this was the word choice you were going for, but to
me it seemed like you used it just to rhyme. A better word could have
been used, even if it didnt rhyme.
I liked this poem because of the rhyme scheme. Every stanza has a different one, and that kept me hooked throughout the whole thing. The first stanza was "ABAB". The next was the same, except the last two lines did not rhyme with anything, which could be emphasizing something. Then, the last stanza was "AAABBA". The variety of schemes used helped keep me hooked, which is a huge positive.
ReplyDelete