Rain
It’s cold
And wet
And kisses your face when you step outside.
Clouds
They’re white
And fluffy
And look like big puffy marshmallows.
Snow
It’s cold
And white
And melts to the touch on your tongue.
Hail
It’s hard
And small
And hurts if you stand outside while it’s falling.
You had some really good sensory imagery in here, like when you described the snow as "It's cold, and white, and melts to your tongue", but I would say to work on your rhythm. Not even rhythm, but just the way you word this poem. The whole It's _____ And ____ And_________ sounds awkward. I realize that you are trying for repetition effect, but maybe you can do it another way? What you have here almost seems like you are telling instead of showing, or describing. It IS a good foundation though, nice work! :)
ReplyDeleteThis was a good imagery poem because I was able to picture a lot in my head, but I think it could have been a little more effective, but other than than, it was good!
ReplyDeleteI liked this poem because of the imagery. For example, when you said "Clouds They’re white And fluffy And look like big puffy marshmallows." I could imagine the fluffiness of the clouds. Thereofore, I liked this poem because of this imagery used to describe the clouds. :)
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